
This moment is the perfect opportunity to build a life and closet that's uniquely right for you.
Welcome! I’m Marya Choby, the founder of Be So You, a holistic style blog for midlife women over 40.
Turning 40 is a time for feeling grounded and empowered in being yourself.
I discovered this in a big way. You see, earlier in my life in my 20s, I lost myself in relationships. I wouldn’t speak my truth because I worried what other people would think of me.
I’d confide in my mom and she’d say to me, “Marya, the most important relationship you’ll ever have is the one you have with yourself.” She encouraged me to stay true to myself.
At 34, I married a great guy who wasn’t my right person. At 38, I acknowledged I was in the wrong marriage and took a big step forward toward the life I authentically wanted.
I embraced 40 with the confidence that I was right where I needed to be. I didn’t know what the future held. Or whether I would marry again or have kids (we hadn’t in my first marriage). And my life looked very different from my friend’s lives.
But hitting midlife, I truly came alive as I learned to hear what was in my heart and follow my inner compass.
I made a midlife career shift after studying my Human Design led me to release ideas about what I “should” do for work. Going from a trained therapist and coach to writing a fashion and lifestyle blog and studying at an international style school at the age of 48 is a dream come true.
If there’s one thing I know, it’s that life is meant to be a series of reinventions.
Be So You is a fashion & lifestyle blog that I created to empower other midlife women to lean into their uniqueness and welcome the opportunities and promise available at any size and any stage of life. Here you’ll find inspiration and outfit ideas for what to wear over 40. Tons of style tips and affirmation, and empowerment in knowing you are right where you need to be.
Are you ready to approach your next phase in life with greater self-knowing and wisdom than ever before? I hope visiting this space inspires you to design an aligned life that’s uniquely perfect for you, along with a closet you love.
Be So You is a place where we talk about midlife as a time for feeling good in your own skin and celebrating the freedom that comes with knowing yourself better than ever.
Be heart-led. Trust your inner wisdom and learn to love that changing body of yours. Build a wardrobe and life you love.
Be So You.
A little bit more about me.

I LOVE A GOOD MAKEOVER STORY
I never missed an episode of What Not to Wear in my 20s. And my favorite books showed me how to put together outfits. I'd literally fall asleep thinking about what I wanted to wear next. Later, I had an actual spreadsheet to manage my capsule wardrobe, which I had to ditch because I love clothes too much. Today, this blog lets me play with clothes for a living. And I still believe in the power of clothing to transform people from the outside in.

If you really want to know about me...
I'm midsized and triangle shaped. That means a size 12 or Large on the bottom, and small on the top. I'm also an INFP on the MBTI. Emotional Manifesting Generator. And a 4/6 Profile in Human Design.

I'm also a HSP
I'm a high functioning highly sensitive person and environmental empath.

I used to work as a licensed therapist.
I've got a master's in social work, and after grad school, I worked as a licensed therapist. From there, I was a paid Academic Coach and Career Coach in a university and college setting. My training is in health, relationship and dating coaching, positive psychology and Human Design. Now I'm studying Style Coaching™ at the Style Coaching Institute™.

And when at Home...
I'm mom to two fur babies – a mini dachshund and terrier mix. And I live with my husband, Adam, nestled up against the Blue Ridge Mountains in Charlottesville, Virginia.
"To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you into something else is the greatest accomplishment."
Ralph Waldo Emerson
New to Be So You? Here are some of my recent posts.
What's Human Design, anyway?
I’m so glad you asked! Human Design is a synthesis of systems and science that uses your birth information to guide deeper self awareness.
In this Quick Start Guide to Human Design for Midlife Women, I’ll guide you through your chart. You’ll come to understand what your type reveals about purpose, personality, and unique energy configuration so you can dance your own dance and live out your unique brand of magic.
Are you ready to get started?
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